Why Do You Seek Happiness When You Already Have It?

It is important that we begin to conceive happiness as a way of life and as a path, not as a goal that we must achieve in the long term.

You live in a constant craving and need, in which you seek happiness as if it had been yours before and you had lost it along the way. Sometimes, it becomes the only goal in life.

To achieve that goal,  there is no shortage of self-help books that try to convince you of the need to make changes. Practices such as Mindfulness or coaching courses , increasingly famous, are also common.

Despite all the resources you have, you still don’t feel it. It is  like an eternal search for the Holy Grail,  where you can never find the right path, the divine sign, the revelation of the last moment.

What is going wrong?

Happiness is not in what we have

It doesn’t matter how many possessions we have. In the end, many people end up giving in to the immense well-being that compulsive shopping produces. For many, it is the closest they can qualify as “happiness.” A positive feeling that, unfortunately, does not last long.

The amount of objects that we have around will not make us feel better. In many cases, it is just a way of trying to fill an existential void.

In fact, according to research by a team from the University of Michigan,  we turn to shopping very often, in order to reduce our daily sadness.

We must take into account the following:

• The material is just that. Things to which we value, but do not really fill us entirely.
• Trying to cover what we lack with external elements takes us further away from happiness. This feeling is not bought with money.

Happiness is not a goal

We believe that everything we do in our life is aimed at achieving happiness. However, what are the most common goals if we ask around us?

• Having a good job: getting good grades in class and getting to work in a large company with a good salary is something that many would need in order to be happy.
• Finding a “better half”: a good job is not everything if you fail in your love relationships. Therefore, finding that person who complements you is an indispensable condition.
• Form your own family:  now that you have everything, you need to think about your offspring. Children will give meaning to your life.
• Enjoy your retirement surrounded by grandchildren:  you have already worked a lot, you deserve to enjoy yourself. Travel, play with your grandchildren and enjoy your partner, the one with whom you have shared thousands of moments.

Are you looking for happiness in this way? Do you really think that following this pattern of behavior is synonymous with success? Remember that not everyone wants to have children. Also, that  there are people who do not want to search and capture a stable partner.

We cannot all measure ourselves by the same yardstick, nor try to fit a mold that is not for us. Let’s put aside what society expects, and focus on what we want.

Happiness does not have the same measure for everyone

If we seek happiness, it is time for us to forget the steps to follow that have been imposed on us. Our life is not the same as that of our family, friends or acquaintances.

Everyone should look for what makes them feel good, regardless of the clichés. Many times, obsessed with finding that long-awaited happiness, we do not realize that we have it in front of us.

Moreover, as this study carried out by a team from Harvard University explains , we cannot perceive it because our minds are always too busy. An always erratic brain, which does not know how to appreciate the here and now, shapes an unhappy mind.

Happiness is in balance

When we refer to happiness we are not talking about a state of mind, although it is defined that way. Rather, we are alluding to those moments of our life full of well-being.

Emotions fluctuate. We cannot always be happy, because we are human and the stimuli that are around us sometimes make us feel sadness, joy, melancholy, etc.

However, regardless of our emotions, today we can be in the best moment of our lives, that which we call the label “happiness”.

In the present is where true bliss lies.